How To Give Her The Attention She Desires

Kevin Anthony 0:11
Welcome to the Love Lab podcast a safe place to get real about sex. Whether you’re a man or woman, single or couple, this is the show for you.

Céline Remy 0:20
We are your hosts, Kevin Anthony and Céline Remy and we are here to guide you to go from good to amazing in the bedroom and beyond.

Kevin Anthony 0:28
All right, welcome back to the Love Lab podcast. This is episode 225. And it is titled How to give her the attention she desires. Okay, so this is my first podcast without my amazing super host Silene. So please bear with me, as I kind of recreate the flow of the show. So I don’t expect the show to change a whole lot other than we will, of course, be missing the amazing Celine, and all of the amazing information and insights that she had to share.

I will say this, however, that we worked together and worked together for so long, that we kind of you know, people are close friends describe this as one brain. So a lot of what I will continue to share on this show still comes from her. So even though she will be greatly missed on the show, I will do my best to continue to share the same wisdom that she would have shared if she were here.

All right. So having said that today, we are going to be talking about how to give her the attention she desires. And we’ve talked about this little in different ways on the show, but I don’t think we’ve ever done an entire episode on it. And again, so much of what we do here on this show comes from people that we work with our friends, you know, things that we see out there in the world. And this is just another example of that.

So this comes from a friend who is dating. And there are a couple of things that had happened in her dating life, where she felt like, she wasn’t really given the attention that she wanted from the person she was dating. And what’s interesting was really to see how it affected her, and how it affected her views on the relationship itself. So rather than just be like, Oh, I didn’t get it, okay, whatever. It was actually. It was changing the way she was viewing the relationship. And that’s a really important key. And we’ll talk way more about that as we go through the show.

But I see a lot of men struggle with this. In fact, we get comments on our YouTube channel all the time, and guys will say things like, Oh, she’s so needy, or oh, this is so much work. Or one guy even commented, as soon as they perfect sex robots, women will be obsolete, right? And those types of comments come from guys who are frustrated, who think that this is a lot of work, who feel like they shouldn’t have to do these things in order to maintain a relationship with a woman.

And I can understand that frustration to a point. But the reality is those types of men are completely misunderstanding, women, and why this is important, and also how to do it. So we’re going to talk about all of that. But before we do that, let’s hear a word from our sponsor, which is power and mastery. Do you want to join the secret club of men who are great in bed then check out power and mastery. It is the most complete sexual mastery training for men. Whether you want to have harder erections, last longer or increase your sexual skills. There is something for you at power and mastery.com. You have heard us read that ad many many times on this show of course used to be one of Celine’s tasks here was to read the ads. So you already know that it’s our online program that we created.

We are currently on version 2.0 And just let you know 3.0 is in the works. Basically what Céline And I had planned was where we were going to take The 2.0 version, and add some of the latest research and techniques and things that have come out. Since we created 2.0. We started working on that together, and I will continue working on it, I don’t have a timeline for when 3.0 will be released. But know this, if you buy the current version, any updates that happen to power and mastery, you will automatically get for free. So you don’t have to wait for that to come out.

I suggest if you are struggling in the bedroom that you purchase power and mastery now, and when we add new information to it, you will always have access to it. Okay. So let’s move on and get into the meat of this episode. Which is of course how to give her the attention she desires. So I want to start with why should men do this? Because again, I give you some examples of of comments that we get on our YouTube channel. I really want men to understand that this is really important. So a few reasons why you might want to do this.

Number one, this is who women are. All right, so the guys who are like once they perfect sex robots, women won’t be needed anymore. Okay, great, you go have fun with your Sex Robot. For the rest of us who actually want to have relationships with actual humans. And female humans, we have to accept that there are certain things that make women, just like there are certain things that make men, right. So women do the same thing with us.

Like, there’s stuff that we do that they’re just kind of like they roll their eyes and whatever, but they accept that that’s who we are as men, and that’s okay, as long as it’s not something bad or destructive, or, or hurtful or whatever, you know, just little things, maybe they don’t like that. I don’t know, we’d like to watch sports or something like that, because they don’t really care about sports, but they know that we’re men. And that’s just part of who we are.

So the same thing goes here with women and attention. Women need to feel like you are giving them attention. It’s just part of who they are as females. And it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, a lot of men like that, too. A lot of men need to feel that they’re getting attention from their women. So it’s not even specifically a woman thing. But I would say to a greater extent, it’s a woman thing. And that’s perfectly fine. You just have to understand that and accept it. Once you do that, then you realize that this is an important thing that you need to do.

Okay, number two, this will help women feel more connected. If you have like, if you’re a guy and you’ve been in a relationship, at least one and you’ve been in it for more than a day, then you have to understand that women need to feel connected. And you know, Selena used to talk about this all the time, and we talk anything about how to make sex better from the female end, it always comes down to how connected does she feel to you.

So if she’s not feeling connected to you, you’re not going to have great sex. But if she’s not feeling connected to you, you’re also not going to have a great relationship. So giving her this attention that she’s craving that she’s desiring will help her feel more connected to to you. Now, number three, this will help women feel more safe. We’ve talked about this a lot. We did an entire episode here on the Love Lab podcast, about the need for women to feel safe. I don’t remember off the top of my head what episode that is, if Céline was here, she would be looking it up right now. And she would give it to you. I can’t do everything at once on this show.

So I’m not going to look it up. But I can tell you we did do an entire episode on it. It wasn’t titled How to make a woman feel safe. It was kind of like the number one thing that she needs or something like that. I don’t remember the exact title. But go listen to that show. It was an entire episode on why it is so important for women to feel safe in their relationships and all of the benefits that brings to you as the man when she does feel safe. So know that by giving her the attention that she craves, she’s going to feel safe, or at least it’s going to help her feel safe.

There’s a little bit more to it than just giving her attention. That’s why we did a whole episode on it but just know that it will help her feel more safe. Number four, this will significantly improve the quality of your relationship. One of the biggest things that we see when we work with clients is there’s a day connection in the relationship. And that’s often what leads to a lot of the problems that they then show up to us to help solve. And so by giving her the attention that she needs and desires,a lot of those types of things will work themselves out, they will get better your relationship will get better.

I guarantee you this. And I can give you examples from my own past, where I neglected this to some extent, and learn the lesson the hard way. I was dating a woman in my late 20s, early 30s. And I had just moved to a new state. She came out and followed me a few months later. And because I was out here a few months before her, I was already meeting people making friends doing things, and I was really into mountain biking at the time. And I had met some really high level mountain bikers, some pro riders, a guy who was starting his own team. And I was riding with him every weekend.

Well, now my girlfriend comes and joins me in this new place. And she knows nobody. Now granted, while I’m with her during the week, you know, she was doing an internship at the time, I was working at the time, and going back to school, and on the weekends, every weekend, I would go ride. And, you know, for me, that was a great way to handle stress. And it was a big part of my fiscal workout routine. She never said anything. She didn’t complain about it.

But I did find out later on, that she actually had cheated on me. And when we really got down to it and dove into why did this happen? It was really because I was not giving her enough time and attention. I was just too busy with work, school, and mountain biking. And here she was all by herself in a new state. She didn’t know a lot of people. And yeah, we had a great relationship when we were together. But it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t enough.

And honestly, when I realized that I realized it really I mean, not to get make an excuse for her bad behavior, because she still shouldn’t have done that. But I realized how I contributed to it, I realized how my actions deliberately led to that outcome. We actually managed to work that out. And I started giving her a lot more attention. And we stayed together for several more years after that, and we actually had a great relationship until it was time to move on. So I started telling that story is number four. But I actually wrote here, number five, this will prevent her from cheating on you.

Of course, nothing will 100% prevent your woman from cheating on you. But know that one of the number one reasons why women do cheat is because they’re not having their needs met. And well, that can be for a lot of reasons. But one of them is they’re not getting the time and attention from you that they require. So then they seek that time and attention externally outside the relationship from somebody else. So yeah, if you’re making sure that you’re giving her the attention that she needs, she’s not going to do that. Most likely.

All right, number six. This is a fundamental human need of all women. That’s kind of another way of saying number one, but this is a fundamental need of women. And if you have your guy and you haven’t figured that out yet, I’m sorry, but you better figure it out quick, if you want to have good relationships, it just is. And it’s okay. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with it at all. It’s just who they are, they need to feel you they need to feel connected to you, they need to feel that you are giving them the attention that they need to feel safe to feel secure to feel connected.

So those are some of the reasons, uh, you know, we say this on the show all the time, like we make these lists, right? And I always want you to know, they’re not the end all be all like, because I put six things in the list doesn’t mean there’s only six reasons. I’m sure if I sat down and gave it a lot more time to think about it. I could come up with even more reasons why you would want to give her the attention that she craves. But these are some of the top ones and I’m sure you might even come up with more.

If so, put them in the comments. on YouTube or on the podcast, send us an email at support at the Love Lab podcast and tell us, we’d love your feedback. Yes, I know, I’m still using us. I’m still including Selena on this for now. So we want to hear from you. So tell us those things. Alright, so now that you understand why you would want to give her the time and attention? How, how do you do this? Like, what does it really mean when we say, give her attention?

Well, that is a great question. So I have a list of things here. Kind of not really generic things, but just generic ways to give attention. And then after that, I have some specific examples of how Céline and I used to do it, and how we would provide attention to each other, and some of the ways that I would do it for her. So let’s just start with some of the basic stuff first, okay. Number one, stop what you’re doing and listen to her when she wants to talk.

This is a big mistake men make, and I don’t care. I mean, okay, maybe if you’re in the middle of something super important, like really important. You can say, Honey, I really want to hear what you have to say, Can you wait 30 minutes, an hour, two hours until I finish this so that I can give you my full attention, that’s fine, you can do that. But in general, for the little things day to day, stop, stop whatever you’re doing, and just listen to her when she wants to talk to you.

You could be watching TV, whatever it is reading the paper, or I don’t know, whatever it is that you’re doing. And I know a lot of times guys are in the middle of reading this thing or, or watching this thing or whatever. It’s okay. Whatever it is, you’re watching cannot possibly be that important. I don’t care what it is. Everything, you can probably go back and watch online again later anyway. Or you can rewind or your TiVoing it or whatever you’re doing with it. You know, I don’t even know if TiVo is still a thing. But just stop and listen to her.

It’s really, really important. Because what a lot of guys do is they just kind of like they’re on their phones, or they’re doing their thing. And they’re going, yeah, uh huh. Okay, yeah, that sounds good. She knows she can feel that you are not really connected to her. So even though you’re giving a response, you’re sort of pretending to pay attention. She feels that you’re not really connected. So stop whatever you’re doing, look her in the eye. And listen to what she has to say. You have no idea how far that will go with her. Just taking the time to stop and listen to her when she wants to talk to you. It sounds so simple, but it is a huge way to give her the attention that she craves and desires.

Okay, number two, set aside time to just be with her. Okay. All right, we got to stop and talk about this one a little bit. One of the things that I notice in the dating world, not that I’m in the dating world, but just from working with a lot of people who are in the dating world, is that when people are dating, they basically want to always schedule something to do so here’s what I hear from people I work with and friends of mine, oh, we’re going to this art show, oh, we’re going to see this movie, oh, we’re going to this concert or this performance, or he’s taking me into his favorite thing, or there’s this thing going on or that thing going on? Okay?

There’s nothing wrong with that at all. But you’re not really focused on each other necessarily when you’re doing those types of things. You’re engaged in whatever’s happening that time you of course, you’re there with the person. So you are creating shared experiences. But you’re not really focusing one on one. And so when a lot of the women that we’ve worked with, or just even our friends have said, it’s like, hey, you know, it was really great that he took me out on some really fun dates. And we did some cool stuff. But now what I really want is to just like get to know him a little bit, right?

And so it’s really important when you’re dating or even if you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, when you do things together, schedule some time to just be with her. So what does that even mean? Right? Like just be with her? Well, we always tell people, of course to schedule a date night so Yeah, of course, schedule a date night. But date night doesn’t have to be okay, we’re gonna go to dinner, we’re going to do a movie, we’re going to do this we’re going to do that date night can be, hey, let’s just light a fire.

Let’s sit in front of the fire. And let’s talk to each other could be about anything, Céline and I used to make up all kinds of fun little games to do stuff. I mean, I remember at one point, I mean, we’ve been together many years. And she said, Tell me something that I don’t know about you. You know, so you can do stuff like that, like, oh, wow, what’s something that she doesn’t know about me, you know, in that particular instance, you know, because we had such amazing communication.

And we talked to literally about everything. I was like, Whoa, I actually can’t think of anything that you don’t already know about me, which was kind of cool. You know, I mean, she was like, Oh, come on, there’s got to be something else, like, Ah, I don’t know, I don’t know. And I really couldn’t come up with anything. Because we had shared everything. But the reason why I couldn’t come up with everything is because we would do this frequently.

And how many of you do that in your own relationships where you just sit down and talk, you know, of course, we had the type of communication where I could tell her anything. I mean, I could tell her any story about any past relationship that we had, or some funny or silly thing that happened, you know, and nothing was off limits, and we could talk about it. And she just wanted to know, all of those details. So make sure that you set time aside to just be with her. This was also a big thing that came up with a friend who’s who’s currently dating, where the person that she’s dating is taking her out to do all this cool stuff. And she appreciates it all.

And, and at the same time, she’s like, Hey, can’t we just do a date where we just sit at home, look at the view with a glass of wine and just get to know each other more like, go deeper. All right. Number three, take genuine interest in her world. And what she is up to, this is another thing that guys tend to be not so good at, right? They’re, they’re really interested in their stuff, whatever they’re into, whether it’s sports, or cars, or work, or whatever it is, and they’ll talk about it all day long. But then they never really ask about her. What is she into?

What’s going on in her world? Right. So you know, there were, there were things that Céline Did that weren’t necessarily my interest. Like she loved knitting. Like, that’s probably something that audience doesn’t know about her. She loves to knit, she loves to make stuff. Well, as a guy, I don’t really have any interest in knitting. But I knew that it was something that she loved and was important to her. So I made it a point to learn about knitting, I would ask her stuff like, how does that work? And how do you do this? And how did you learn that?

And what happens when you do this? And tell me about different types of wools and things that you use? Not because I really wanted to learn knitting, I’m never going to knit anything, most likely, I guess I shouldn’t say never. But because it was something that she loved, and she had an interest in I wanted to know about. And that’s just one example. There’s tons of other things too. So take interest in the things that she is interested in, even if it’s something that you don’t care about, right? I mean, guys are like, Oh, who cares about my hair, and makeup and clothes, or those types of things that women are into?

Well, you don’t have to care about it for yourself, but you should be interested in it because she’s interested in it. You know, tell me about this new makeup that you just bought? Why is it so special? Why are you so excited? I mean, you know, something didn’t really wear a lot of makeup partially because, you know, I didn’t really care for it. And I didn’t think she needed it. I used to tell her all the time that she looked beautiful without it didn’t need it.

But she likes to put some on from time to time, you know, and she would find these, you know, organic makeups, you know, made from these small little artists and companies and she gets super excited about it. So I’d say Well, tell me about it. Like what’s different about it? Why is this stuff so cool? Why are you so excited about it? Right? You’ve got to take interest in the things that she is interested in. All right, number four, give her space to talk. Who this is another one I see a lot of guys do it. They want to talk about themselves all day long. Right?

And they never give her space to share. The problem with that is she doesn’t feel like she is seen or heard. Right and feeling seen or heard also means that you’re giving her attention. So when she feels like you are listening to her and that she has an opportunity to express whatever because she wants to express that signals to her that you are giving her attention. So make sure that you give her the space to talk. I sound so simple but so many guys just don’t do it. Okay, so who all right this this is the show is going quite well, in my opinion for my first real solo show without saline.

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All right. So let’s get back into our list. How do men show appreciation and give attention to their women? All right, we left off we covered number four, number five on the list, share deeply with her about yourself. Okay? What do we mean by that? One of the ways that women feel connected to you is when you share things with them, that you don’t share with everybody else. Like if the if this woman is your partner in life, she wants to know that she’s special.

And one of the ways that she feels that is that you share things with her that are not just surface level stuff that everybody knows. So we talked about setting time aside to just be with her, this is one of the things you can do during that time, is really shared deeply about yourself. Things that not a lot of people don’t know, maybe even things that you’re a little shy or afraid to actually say that type of stuff will make her feel deeply, deeply connected to you. And she wants that she wants to know those things he absolutely does. Number six, balance your work and relationship time. This is another big mistake that we see men making a lot. I see when I work with men, I see that they’re really great at making time when they’re dating? Well, because you, you kind of have to right? If you don’t make time, you don’t go on the date. So therefore you’re not actually dating.

But once they get settled down, and they’re in a secure relationship, they’re like, Okay, I got the woman, that’s all done. Now I can focus on my work, my hobbies, my whatever else, right? No, wrong, big mistake. It is really important that you balance the time spent on whatever else you do in life, and your relationship. And if you’re not giving enough time, to your relationship, it is going to suffer. It just is I had a client about a year ago, very successful.

Client ran his own business, I don’t want to say what his business was there or give it away at all, who he is. You know, all client information is confidential. But he was successful. And he worked hard. He built his own business. And he was running his business and teaching in the evenings at a local college. Now that’s cool. I’ve done that in the past to where I had like my main gig where I was successful. And then I would either teach a class in the evenings or do like I’ve done those things before. And when, especially when I was young, and I was motivated, and I had lots of energy, and I wanted to do all those kinds of things I did. But the problem is, is there’s only so much time in a given day.

And if you’re putting all your time and attention on those types of things, then you don’t have the time and attention to give to your relationship. And if you do that it’s going to suffer. You know, we were kind of talking in the beginning of this show about this is a fundamental needs to who women are, you know, you have to look at it like if you want to have plants in your house, plants are going to need a certain number of things in order to thrive and stay alive.

They’re going to need a certain amount of sunlight, they’re going to need a certain amount of water, they’re going to need a decent soil a good pot, right? Those are things that you need to give it in order for it to not only stay alive but then thrive. And we humans are no different whether we’re men or women. Now as men or women, we might need slightly different things and what we need to really thrive. But in this case, realize that one of the things that women need Need to thrive in a relationship is attention, they just do. So you need to give it to them. So make sure that you take you balance, your work and your relationship time super important.

And you know, most people don’t even really like what they do for a living anyway. So wouldn’t you want to give more time to the thing that you really like, which is your relationship. And if you don’t really like your relationship, you’re either in the wrong one, or it’s because you’re not giving it the time and attention, right. So give it the time and attention in the relationship will get better, suddenly, you’ll like it. And then you’ll want to give it more time and attention. Alright, number seven, create activities or games that are intended to create deeper connection Céline. And I used to do this all the time, we would just create games like on date night, we would just make them up. And you’ve heard us talk about it.

We’ve done YouTube videos on it, where we gave you a few of our top games that we like to play. But this is a really great way to connect and give attention to each other and especially to her. And number eight, oh, this this one, I just kind of threw on the end of the list because it’s something that Céline started in our relationship and I grew to absolutely love it, which is greet her at the door when she comes home. Now we started this because she started greeting me at the door when I would come home.

So if I was out and about doing something at a client’s whatever, I would come home no matter what she was doing, she would stop, she would get up and she would come to the door and give me a big hug and welcome me home. And I thought wow, this is amazing. This feels really good. Of course, if I love it, she would love it too. So when she gets home, I mean assuming that you’re home first. Make sure that you stop whatever you’re doing and go greet her at the door, give her a hug, give her a kiss. Tell her how much you missed her and how happy you are that she is home. And if you’re not really happy, she’s home and you didn’t really miss her, then you better start giving her more attention and fix this relationship or you need to be in a relationship where you are happy that she’s home.

Okay. Oh boy, I got a lot more to cover. We’re getting long here. Céline would be rushing me if she were here. So I’m gonna go a lot faster. Number nine. look in her eyes when she is talking. And this is another thing a lot of guys don’t do they’re too busy looking at their phones or watching the TV or whatever they’re doing. And they’re not focusing their attention on her when she’s talking. Bad move, bad move. Always make sure that you look at her and give her attention. When she’s talking. It’s that simple. All you got to do is put the damn phone down for a minute.

Look her in the eye and give her some attention. Number 10 Hug her kiss her massage her without expecting it in return. This is a great way to give her attention. We all have a need for physical touch, for cuddling for kisses, hugs, all of that kind of stuff. There’s so much research on what a simple hug even from a stranger can do for somebody’s emotional and psychological well being. So you’ve got to be doing that for your partner, you know, through the really tough times with saline when she was really hurting and really not doing well physically. I knew that you know she didn’t want to be physical or intimate because she was struggling.

But I also knew that it made her feel connected and like still connected to me in that way. So what would I do? If she was sitting at the kitchen table I would walk by I would give her a hug from behind I would massage her shoulders or her arms or just touch her just stroke her back just anything to make her feel like she was still connected to me even though she was having a hard time and hard time or no hard time. You need to be doing that stuff with your partner. You need to give her that kind of touch and physical attention assuming of course that she likes it.

There are few women that don’t like that, but generally in a connected healthy relationship she’s going to love want and crave that Alright, number 11 Take time to cuddle with her women love to cuddle and honestly guys if you’re not into cuddling you should be because again all the research clearly shows that cuddling definitely positively benefits our psychology like As humans, we are social creatures. We need touch, we need to be around people we need to cuddle. We need that like it really, really helps us. Number 12 Do things that she is interested in.

So I kind of talked about this earlier. Where you know some of the some of our friends who are dating are like he’s taking me here there and everywhere and it’s kind of cool, but it’s all stuff he enjoys and he won wants to do. And if once for once I wish he would just ask, What would I like to do, right? So make sure that you do things that she’s interested in. It’s great when you have ideas, and you’re like, Hey, I got this cool idea, this thing, how would you like to do this? And she will most likely be like, Yeah, that’s cool, okay. And at the same time it’s really important that you ask her and check in with her like, what? What is it that she wants to do?

Alright, number 13. And notice her when she wears something sexy and compliment her. This was a big one for Celine, she would be telling you a story right now about how in her first marriage, she was very young. And he was a little bit older. And you know, she would want to get his attention, like he’d be on the computer or whatever. And so she’d put something sexy on and go walk past him, right? And he wouldn’t even notice and it would just drive her crazy. She’s like, how can you not notice me walking across this room half naked, right. And believe me, I don’t know how he didn’t notice her look up either. But for whatever reason, he didn’t.

So you got to make sure that you do that. Because women will do little things like that. Even if it’s not half naked, they’ll just they’ll put on a new shirt, a new dress or a new skirt or something that that new, even a new pair of jeans and like they’ll walk past you and they’re they’re expecting you to notice. I know guys go How am I supposed to notice those things. But if you’re genuinely connected with her and interested in her, you’ll notice these things like it’s not work, guys always think, oh, it’s gonna be so much work. And I gotta pay attention to these. It’s not work if you genuinely care. Number 14. And notice when she changes something is basically the same thing.

Right? So maybe she does her hair in a new way or gets a new color or like, yeah, Celine wood trim, like, like, a quarter inch off her bangs when she used to have bags. And then she’d be like, Look, right? And in the beginning, I’d be like, Oh, what am I looking at? Right? And then I kind of learned and I started paying a little bit more attention in my bag. Oh, I noticed you trim your bags a little bit. Right? She loved it when I would notice that stuff. Number 15. Tell her she’s beautiful.

You gotta tell her she’s beautiful. If you don’t think she’s beautiful. Why are you in a relationship with her? Just the simple act of like, because we do this all the time, right? We’ll just happen to notice her. Maybe the sun’s coming through the window on a certain angle, and it lights her face, or she puts something on that looks really good on her. And it’s guys, we think about it, we notice it. And now wow, that’s cool. But so many guys don’t say it. They don’t voice it.

So what I’m saying here is you need to speak it. When you think of it when you notice it speak up and say something it’s really important. And number 16 speak to her in her primary love language, we did an entire episode on love languages. So figure out what it is that she liked words of appreciation that she liked to get gifts that she loved quality time, then there’s three, two more of the five love languages. Go back and listen to that episode, if you want to know what the love languages are.

But just know that if you are speaking to her in her love language, which means doing the types of things that she really loves most. And you know, out of the love languages, she’s going to feel like that is quality, attention and time that you’re giving her. So make sure that you do that. Again, she would be looking up which episode we did on Love Languages, I don’t remember but it’s in there somewhere. Just search in whatever platform you’re on and find it and listen to it if you want to know more about love languages.

Okay, so those are 16 ways that you can give her the attention that she craves. I’m going to just give you a quick examples, and I’m going to wrap it up for this episode. I honestly thought I was going to struggle to fill an entire episode without my amazing saline next to me. So I’m very glad that I’m able to do this and still give you guys great content, even without her. Although honestly so much of what I’m telling you I’ve learned through her and by being with her.

So her spirit is still here and I’m still sharing great stuff from Céline. A few quick examples. What did what did these look like? We already talked about greeting her at the door. So this was something we did every day for the entire time we were together with either one of us came home, we would greet each other at the door. I would give her a big hug and a kiss and tell her that I missed her. A great way to show her and give her attention.

Number two when she walks by wearing something sexy, which is usually on purpose to get your attention, stop what you’re doing notice her and compliment her she would do this all the time to me. I’d be working on the computer trying to get something done and she’d walked by and something sexy, right? I knew first of all I wanted to look, I really wanted to look because it was fucking hot, right. But I also knew that she wanted me to notice her otherwise she wouldn’t have done it right.

So make sure that when she does stuff like that, that you stop, and you notice and you voice it to her, how sexy how beautiful and how much it turns you off. Number three, set a regular date nights. I know people complain about this all the time. They’re like, I want it to be spontaneous. You’ve heard us talk about this on the show more times than I can possibly count. Don’t worry about the spontaneity you can have spontaneity and spontaneity the other six days out of the week, but make sure you get at least one date night in there that shows to her that you are making time for her, you’re not just going well, we’ll see how the schedule, you know, figures itself out.

And if there’s time, no, you are telling her that you are making her a priority. And you are setting aside this time to be with her. Number four play intimacy games. Like I said, we talked about this a little bit earlier in the show. But it’s something that I used to create games all the time to help with connection. But there’s also online games, we have a sponsor is on our page Céline remy.com, forward slash products. I don’t remember the name of it off the top of my head. But first of all, there’s a bunch of them, right? There’s a bunch of games.

There’s a bunch of stuff from Michael Webb on there that you can get questions, you can ask each other. But there was a new sponsor that we put up not too long ago that specifically makes couples games to do just exactly that. So go check that out. They have great stuff that well, you don’t even have to invent them yourself. If you’re like, Hey, I can’t think of these things on my own. Great. You don’t have to just go to Céline remy.com forward slash products and just go pick one out they’re not very expensive. Alright.

Number five, when you notice things that you like, or admire about her, tell her again, we think about these things. You know, maybe she did something at work that she told you about. And you’re like, Wow, that was pretty cool. I really admire the way she handled that situation. Tell her Tell her just anything that you notice that you like or admire about her, just let her know. She will feel that she was like, Oh, he noticed he actually is paying attention to me.

All right. Number six, always start your morning by asking her how her night was Selena, I used to do this. Every morning when we would wake up. We’ll say how would your night How did you sleep? How do you feel this morning? Sometimes we would do things like what are you excited about for today? You know, like just check in with her like it’s so easy to get wrapped up in the morning routine. The alarm goes off got to get up got to do this that the other thing right, but just 30 seconds, a minute, check in in the morning. It really helps. Number seven, play the appreciation game regularly. You’ve heard Selena and I talked about the appreciation game, she would say to me, tell me three things that you appreciate about me. And then I would find three things that I appreciate about her. A lot of guys. This is something I teach in coaching a lot.

And guys are like, Man, this sounds like a lot of work. It’s not just little things that you do something cool. Did she make you a nice dinner that day or the day before? Did she? I don’t do some small thing. Just recognize her for the little things that she does day to day to make your life better and tell her how much you appreciate it. This game is a revelation to people when we teach it to them. This game alone shifts whole relationships. It’s that good. Isn’t that powerful? All right, and number eight, if she likes touch, give it to her off. And I talked about that one before too. Don’t expect anything in return. I’m not giving her a massage because I want her to turn around and then give me a massage.

No, that’s not how it works. I just give her touch and attention and hugs and whatever she needs on a regular basis. One because I love her too because I want to do that for her and and not because I’m expecting anything in exchange. So those are eight examples of simple things that you can do every single day that give her the attention that she craves. Whew, all right. All right. So I would like to thank Céline for the inspiration for this episode.

And actually, I want to thank a another very close friend of both Celine and ours. I don’t want to say her name on the show today, but she also helped inspire this episode. Actually, it was her dating life that inspired the episode. And then when I sat down to write all of this, I just thought about what did Céline And I do all those years. So I want to thank them both for inspiring this episode. I hope you got value out of it. I look forward to more episodes with you On this show, I want to throw out there also that I do love co hosting the show.

And while I’m perfectly okay continuing on on my own, I would also be open to doing collaborations with people. So if you know anybody that would be a good fit to do some periodic collaborations on the love that podcast, please send them my way via support at the Love Lab. podcast.com. All right, everybody. That’s all I have for you in this episode, and I will see you next week.

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Céline Remy 50:43
And for more free exclusive content. Join us in the passion vault at Célineremy.com/vault. That’s c e l i n e r e m y.com/vault.

Kevin Anthony 50:57
Thanks for listening.

Céline Remy 50:59
And remember, you’re amazing

Transcribed by https://otter.ai